This past weekend, Warren and I had two friends in town - Brian and Ally.
Brian is an old friend from when we lived in Chattanooga, so it was great to see him again. This was actually my first time meeting Ally - she and Brian have been dating for about three years, and they recently got engaged.
We had so much fun with them - trying out a new oyster bar, taking the pups to the park, and absolutely crushing them in Taboo - my most favorite board game.
They got to town on Thursday night and I casually mentioned that I would be heading to therapy at 9am the next morning.
Ally knows I am a therapist, so she assumed I meant that I had a therapy appointment with one of my clients. When I clarified, she said, “Wait, you’re a therapist but you go to therapy?”
I said, “Yes - pretty much every therapist I know has a therapist!”
She was a bit shocked.
The next day, we were talking about therapy again and I shared that I do three things to maintain good mental health:
I go to therapy,
I exercise 4-5 times a week,
And I take Celexa every day.
Even though seeking therapy has become more common in recent years, I think there is still a bit of stigma associated with talking openly about our mental health.
I experienced this same hesitation myself - particularly around taking medication - up until a few years ago.
The pandemic was a stressful season for many (most?) of us.
During those years, Motivo was struggling to grow, I felt pretty isolated from any sense of a community, and Warren and I were working on some hard things in our marriage.
I remember one tearful session with my therapist when she asked, “Have you considered taking medication?”
My immediate thought was, “Are my symptoms bad enough to warrant medication?”
My symptoms were totally bad enough - I wasn’t sleeping well. I felt tense most of the time. I dealt with intrusive ruminating thoughts almost constantly.
It’s so odd, isn’t it?
Even though I’ve been a therapist for 15 years and I’ve seen medication be such a helpful tool to so many, I still struggled to apply the idea of it to my own life and situation.
I think this is because I know the description of major depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder - and I wouldn’t say that I fall into either bucket, or any official diagnosis for that matter.
Rather, life just felt a bit hard.
Author and speaker, Glennon Doyle summed it up nicely when she said:
“Life is hard, not because we are doing it wrong, but just because it’s hard.”
- Glennon Doyle
Knowing that I didn’t have a major mental illness made me feel like I shouldn’t need medication - but I think that’s faulty thinking.
When I take other forms of medication, I don’t expect myself to have an official diagnosis in order to do so. I take Tylenol for a headache when it’s both mildly or moderately bothersome.
While I’m not a doctor and I could never suggest what’s best for someone else - I gotta say that, for me, medication has been amazing.
For me, a safe mood stabilizer just makes life a bit more manageable. It helps me relax my shoulders, unclench my jaws, and worry a lot less about the things outside of my control.
I also think that needing some help with my mental wellbeing isn’t a weakness - rather, I see it as a sign of privilege.
Here’s what I mean…
When I reflect on Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, I think about his theory that our basic needs have to be met before we can invest in some of our psychological and self-fulfillment needs.
I feel fortunate that my basic needs for shelter, security, and food are met.
I am grateful that I have close relationships in my life and I get to spend my days doing work that I feel proud of.
For me, having the time and resources to invest in taking my mental wellbeing from a stable place to a place where I can thrive is a privilege and a gift - not a weakness or shortcoming.
I’m curious, how does this land with you today?
If you’d like to share your thoughts on your own mental health regime, I’d love to hear about it!
Feel free to reply here or drop a comment below.
Warmly,
Rachel
Rachel McCrickard, LMFT
Motivo, CEO/Co-Founder
rachel@motivohealth.com
Thank you for this! One of my knitting buddies helped me realize that my pride was getting in the way of asking an in-home veterinarian for help managing my cats' responses to a recent major stressor. Just because I am normally the one helping stressed-out parents of small children by doing walk-throughs of their homes as a telehealth MFT doesn't mean that I don't also need help with my own home. The vet fee was a great investment and I learned a valuable lesson!